Blog Post #3

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Him
By Kaelyn M.
By day I studied Talmud
and by night I would run to the synagogue to weep
over the destruction of the Temple.
some of the men spoke of God: 
His mysterious ways, 
the sins of the Jewish people, 
and the redemption to come. 
As for me,  I had ceased to pray. I concurred with Job! 
I was not denying His existence, 
but I doubted His absolute justice.
...
"Yisgadal, veyiskadash, shmey  raba…
May His name be celebrated and sanctified..." whispered my father.
For the first time, 
I felt anger rising within me. 
Why should I sanctify His name?
...
"For God's sake, where is God?"
And from within me, I heard a voice answer:
"Where He is? This is where—
hanging here from this gallows..."
...
YOM KIPPUR. The Day of Atonement. 
Should we fast? 
The question was hotly debated.
Apparently, we needed to show God that even here,
locked in hell,
we were capable of singing His praises.
I did not fast.
There was no longer any reason for me to fast. 
I no longer accepted God's silence.
As I swallowed my ration of soup, 
I turned that act into a symbol of rebellion, 
of protest against Him.

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